text @vegemight open // cw: discussion of violence

[magnitudes]

so I saw that there’s some weekly combat classes, that’s good and that
but I’m after something more cathartic and less educational

anyone down for some bareknuckle brawling?
no magic or powers or whatever wild shit you got, just ourselves

no one under 21 but
if you can’t legally buy a drink in some wild NYC bar crawl then we aren’t fighting

Comments

@mrs.maisel

[maisel]

This is the second dumbest idea you've ever had.

-Midge Maisel

[magnitudes]

I never told you I was engaged to someone from a mafia family, did I?

and you don’t need to sign off, Mrs. Maisel

[maisel]

Third dumbest idea you've ever had. Close runner-up: giving me even more ammo. You're loading your own shotgun and handing it to me at this point.

Why would you want everyone to beat up everyone else when we've got terrifying monsters outside to do that for us?

-Midge Maisel

(PS. I like signing my name, it reminds everyone who's talking)

[magnitudes]

I figure your aim can’t be that good, so it seems like an okay risk.

I want to fight because that’s a danger that I’m used to and that I know how to handle. Asking someone if they want to fight is better than starting a brawl with someone poor dickhead.

- correspondent of Midge Maisel

PS. In my time I think we’d call this a Napoleon complex

[maisel]

I'm a verbal Annie Oakley, wait until I can get some of my stand-up off the ground. Pew Pew!

(that was me verbally shooting)

The next time something crazy attacks the village you're going to have a broken nose already from some schmuck that boxed your ears in and you're not going to be able to do anything.

Bad idea. Stick to the training group. You're going to get hurt.

-Midge Maisel, who does NOT have a Napoleon complex

[magnitudes]

thank the tap dancing lord you said those were sound effects, I never would have grasped it otherwise

this might come as a shock to you, but I’m perfectly capable of functioning through pain
there’s worse things to break than your nose

I can look after myself, bless your cottons though.

- person being condescended to by woman with Napoleon complex

[maisel]

My cottons are blessed and if you're saying that in a condescending way I'm going to find you.

I'm worried about you. Since out first meeting you've proven to be a little low on the impulse control. [ Says the hypocrite. ]

- Mrs Maisel, who is now doing this out of sheer spite.

[magnitudes]

Can it be genuine and affectionate and a little bit condescending just to satisfy my cynicism quota?

( The next part takes longer for her to compose. For a while she’s just sitting in her and Molly’s place, back against the wall, Thinking. )

Don’t waste your energy worrying about me. It’d be like changing the tyres on a car that’s going to the wrecking yard.

- Sarissa Theron