Audio | @silent, @parker, @riku | open

[callada]

[ It has been hours since the lighthouse crew returned to Beacon. You may have seen them around already - checking up on friends and strangers alike, making sure people are safe from the forest spirits and their violence. So it’s some time after that the audio file is posted to the network. ]

Riku: It’s done. The lighthouse is connected.

Peter: That’s the good news. [ a beat; frankly, peter’s tired and it’s reflected in the audible exhale of breath that follows the brief statement. ] Which means we can now communicate with the Lighthouse Keeper and she can communicate with us. I know— things didn’t exactly go as planned, at the lighthouse or — here, but Winters said there’d be a risk. [ the word’s enunciated carefully, with weight; it’s accompanied by the brief sound of movement. that they all knew there'd be the risk of death going into this doesn't change the gravity of what had happened, and though there's more to it than this, peter continues with: ]

—The spirits attacked once they figured out what we were trying to do. [ breath of a pause; amendment. ] Once they thought they figured out what we were trying to do—.

[ in person, peter's attention flickers between rosinante and riku. ]

Rosinante: They came for us immediately when they found us. We ran, but Winters was at the rear and they got him first. Five was first to try and help him, and they killed him too.

[ Said bluntly, matter-of-factly. There’s no desire to beat around the bush, though he does sound solemn as he continues. ]

I can’t speak for the others, but I’ll be here at the Invincible for now if anyone has questions, or needs somewhere to hide.

[ For now, all three are there around the tables by the bar, looking tired and covered in blood and dirt. Worse for wear, but alive. ]

((Feel free to either reply via network or come find them in person!))

Comments

@parker

[webshoots]

We got the Keeper connected. I'm not really sure what else you were expecting us to achieve.

[ no deaths? yeah, that'd have been absolutely great, peter would have loved that, but that's not what happened and if they'd died and been unsuccessful in getting the keeper connected? that'd have been a waste, for all involved. ]

[saibot]

Yes, you did at the cost of your companions.

1/something idk give me a moment

[webshoots]

Okay, so tell me: what would success have looked like for you? The Keeper gets hooked up and no-one dies? That's it? That's great, [ s c r o l l s up. "subzero"? yeah, no, that's ridiculous. ] Vanilla Ice, but the universe generally isn't that fond of those odds.

[webshoots]

It was a risk going in, we all knew that. [ "I'd have loved for everyone to make it back alive"? written, deleted. ]

[webshoots]

[ A FEW MINUTES LATER... ]

Look, I get it. No-one likes or wants to lose anyone.

We

4/5

[webshoots]

The last thing we wanted to do was leave them there.

5/5

[webshoots]

But the moment we start counting their deaths as failure is the moment we're setting ourselves up to fail at everything. [ "you can't save everyone." "I've been there". peter's had his whole 'no-one dies whilst spider-man's around' thing and it'd been emotionally, mentally, physically draining. it had been an utterly unrealistic pressure he'd placed on himself and— nah. not going back down that road. ] We make sure we succeed BECAUSE of their sacrifice.

action

[equinoctials]

[ Riku hasn't participated much at all, but he's watching the responses come in, mainly as a distraction from his injuries. It's this exchange in particular that has his eyes wandering to Peter's back.

He puts down the tablet. Pushes himself up off the chair he'd been resting in and limps slowly over to where Peter is, reaches out to clasp his shoulder, shaking his head once he's caught his attention. ]

Hey. Let's talk later.

[webshoots]

[ peter tenses a little at the touch, almost immediately relaxing when he clocks that the person's riku. the head shake earns a quirk of his lips and a loose shrug of a shoulder; there's a breath of a pause as he attention flickers back down to his tablet, then back up to riku. ] Why do I feel like I'm getting called to the principal's office? [ it's not a no, but the words 'let's talk' never bode well.

(ugh, uncomfortable conversations.) ]

[equinoctials]

[ The principal's office. It's things like that, they remind Riku of a fairly common cultural background - mundane struggles of everyday things like school right alongside some pretty extenuating circumstances.

Riku doesn't smile, but his gaze softens a little. ]

Had my fill of that a few years ago. I won't force you.

[ He pulls back his hand, touching a knuckle to his own nose as he glances away, a little rueful. ]

Just don't want you shouldering the responsibility yourself.

[webshoots]

[ parker, you got this: joke about the uncomfortable thing until the uncomfortable thing goes away. that's how this works, right?

which is to say: riku's first comment earns a huff of a laugh. ] I actually didn't. [ you know, being more of the 'getting shoved into lockers' kid, but he leaves that part unsaid. ] I just got to imagine what it was like. [ he adds, before riku says that. that thing about shouldering responsibility, and he pulls a face before glancing away. (is he that transparent? why is a teenager picking him up on that? what is his life?) he makes a noise that might be the start of a no, but might as equally just be an 'ngh.' he pauses, expressions shifting into something between sheepish and half-amused, before replying with: ] —Responsibility's kinda my thing, so good luck wrestling that away from me.

—Well, that and a profound love of wheatcakes.

[equinoctials]

[ Peter says he didn't, and Riku envies him a little. The mouth on him, he would've thought it would've landed him in trouble. Maybe he just never crosses the line. It says something about Peter, though, that he was a good enough kid.

Riku's been something of an old soul since he was five. Throw in all the crazy experiences he's had in the last few years and it ages you in ways that don't show up on the outside. When Peter pulls a face and looks away, Riku tracks the movement with a fairly complicated interest. ]

Fair. But you did your best. Pretty sure I wouldn't still be here if you hadn't. Don't let this guy or yourself beat up on you for not somehow saving everybody.

[webshoots]

[ fair, riku says, and peter's hopeful for just a second that that's the end of it, but it's followed almost immediately by a but. (god, does peter hate that word. but. nothing good is ever preceded by a but.)

he wraps a hand around his cup of — well, officially, it's a cup of coffee, but peter's dubious on actually calling it a cup of coffee, because it tastes pretty terrible and the only descriptor peter's actually happy to give it is that it's hot. it's also black, which is fine, because that's how he prefers his coffee, but he's not really sure it's black coffee. ]

I'm not. [ a pause, and peter starts to run his free hand through his hair, before stopping halfway and waving it dismissively. ] I don't mean for this to sound dismissive, but: I get it, I do, probably more than— [ pause; a pointed exhale of breath. goooood, this conversation sucks, riku. ] —More than you'll realise. Sometimes your best is just — [ hnnngh ] days like today, when all you can say is at least it wasn't everyone.

Would I prefer it if Five and the Captain were here as well? Sure, but it's not realistic. I know that. Does that mean it's not going to bother me? No. Does it mean I don't want to deck Vanilla Ice for his lack of compassion? Also no. I do, but he also might have a point. [ about more caution, if not anything else. ] I can acknowledge it, and—

—Look, thanks, I appreciate the sentiment. But I'm just going to throw it out there as well that I wasn't joking about the wheatcakes.

[equinoctials]

[ There's a lot of body language that Riku takes for many of the same unconscious, self-soothing gestures that Riku uses when he's uncomfortable, so he backs off. He understands the need for space, and they just went through one heck of an ordeal.

That resonates, though. That sometimes your best results in days when all you can say is at least you didn't lose everything important.

Except Riku can't really say he hasn't, today. He still hasn't been able to find Sora. Half the reason his attempt to be a diversion failed - necessitating his own rescue - because he could feel the moment his replica was killed, a piece of him ripped from his own heart.

And Kairi, who is already gone. And Peter says that he appreciates the sentiment, brings it back home to whatever wheatcakes are, and Riku puffs out a humorless laugh. ]

Got it. If I ever figure out what those are, guess I'll owe you some.

Later.

[saibot]

It is possible you already do fail at everything. You are here among the dead, are you not?

How do you know your actions were really the correct ones to begin with? That connecting the Keeper won't ultimately make your correct existence a worse one?

[He actually does not care that anyone died (he honestly lacks the capacity to do so) he's just arguing this because he is that kind of person.]

[webshoots]

That’s the thing: we don’t know. We don’t know anything about this place. You do get that, right? That whatever action we take runs the risk of making our existence here better OR worse.

[ and as far as this goes, no-one’s capable of being harder on peter than peter is on himself. has he failed before? sure. has he let people down? definitely. does he have a frankly hilarious and disproportionate amount of guilt knocking around? you betcha. but this isn’t the first time and it won’t be the last time anyone’s attempted to use that guilt against him — and noob’s doing it blindly, so it’s easier to disconnect and acknowledge that it’s not as black and white as he’s trying to make it sound.

still: uuuuuuugh. just ugh. ]

But sure, I’ll run with you for a second. Maybe we failed. Maybe we messed up. Are you saying we should just give up?

[saibot]

Acting with caution is not the same as giving up. Being dead has no time limit, at least not normally. Rushing into action while knowing very little is a foolish plan.

[webshoots]

[ oh, right. acting with caution, that—

is actually a totally fair point. ]

You know there's a sliding scale, right? Such a thing as being too cautious? I'm not saying you're wrong.

[ just that sometimes you can wait for too long. in this case though? would it have been better to wait? was there more information they could have got before heading out to the lighthouse? maybe. maybe not.

—but at the same time, dwelling on maybes never did anyone any good. ]

Just that it's not always that simple.

But look, I appreciate the pep talk here, it's been great.

[saibot]

I never stated to take inaction. In life I was a master thief and assassin. No task is ever completed successfully by rushing in.