[text] @clickfly; I have received a fortune message [open]

[theimpatientone]

I am Merwen, for those whom I have not yet shared meeting.  I am hoping to share knowledge.

I received a message from an unliving doll. I thought it was meant to be a prediction, but it seems to be more a description of a place.

If you've got things you want to get rid of or you want to look for treasure among what others have left behind, there's a place where you can refuel in between two places where both actions can be done.

I am still recently arrived, and I do not know Beacon well enough to think where this place might be, or if this is a place I should seek out.

Comments

[worthallthis]

They didn't reply to us, and they tried to tear us apart. I don't know if that was because they wanted metal in particular-- they focused on my arm, and my friend. He was all made of metal. Or if they were trying in their way to keep us with them. Or if they were just violent.

[They've gone over and over that event in their mind, picking it apart, particularly after finding out about the experiments done on the green-eyes in the Helix station.]

They weren't angry. I am pretty sure of that. But they either didn't understand, or didn't want to understand, and they don't respect our safety or pain.

[theimpatientone]

[Her lips thin. That's not surprising, but it is discouraging.

Also, a person made of metal. She's encountered that before and she DOESN'T LIKE IT but that's beside the point right now.]

That actually gives me hope. If they were actively sharing anger, then that is harder to overcome than mere ignorance or apathy.

[worthallthis]

[You're talking to a dude with a metal arm, Merwen, sometimes metal just happens. They look sidelong at her with some concern.]

If you want to talk to them. Give me time to learn things about them from Ambassador. They might have a dialect that we can learn that will make them understand us better. And promise me. Promise you will not go alone. Please.

[theimpatientone]

[There are metal arms, and then there's metal brains.]

If you could learnshare that, it would be very useful, I think.

I won't seek them out yet, I promise. Not on purpose. If they come to me, though, then I will witness them. Do you understand that I must do this, Soldat? I could never share harm with them.

[worthallthis]

[Not all metal brains are awful, either. Soldat is still sad about losing Daylight.

They'll be sad about losing Merwen, too, they think. So they nod wearily, shoulders a little slumped.]

Can I ask that if they don't seem interested in sharing good things, that you run instead of letting them. Share harm with you?

[theimpatientone]

[She closes her eyes a moment, and gives a long sigh. She doesn't really want to commit to any particular promises at this point, but this is clearly important.]

All right. I will try.

[worthallthis]

[The slump gets more pronounced, this time with relief.]

Thank you. Not everyone who dies, comes back. And I'd hate to lose you, Merwen.

[theimpatientone]

[She smiles, sort of sadly.]

I don't share fear of my own death, not here, not when I'm already dead and caught here instead of moving on. We never truly lose the ones we love, even if we grieve for the loss of a soul in the shape we know. The soul is more permanent than that.

But I am also not in a hurry to meet my death, even if I don't fear it.

[worthallthis]

[Considering all the people Soldat has lost and still isn't particularly great at accepting, that feels a little hollow, but they can focus on the important part: that she's not in a hurry to die again.]

Good. I had to learn that, myself. I died twice and people were very, very upset, so I have to try not to do that again. It might happen, because my job is to protect people. But I have to try.

[theimpatientone]

Soldat.

[She looks squarely at him.]

I don't want you ever to hasten death in my defence. If I am to promise not to hasten my own death, I would ask that you share your own promise in return.

[worthallthis]

[They look momentarily bereft at the question. There's still a part of them that feels like dealing death (in the protection of others, now, but still) is the only thing they're really good for.

It's a brief flicker of expression, though, before they sigh and just look vaguely resigned, instead.]

I will try. Same as you. But if something is trying to kill people right in front of me, I'm. Gonna make sure they don't do that. I can't not. It's hard-wired.

[theimpatientone]

That is the struggle of all selfnamers, Soldat. I trust you to try, as I try not to be impatient.

[But honestly, she's feeling pretty reassured by the whole conversation.]

[worthallthis]

[They attempt a little joke:]

Should I be called Soldat the one who isn't allowed to die again?

[It sounds kind of sad, rather than light, but it's an attempt.]

[theimpatientone]

[She smiles.]

I wouldn't complain, but try to outlive the first name you gave yourself before you take on anymore.

[worthallthis]

[They pause at the idea, looking maybe a little startled by it.]

Wasn't planning on changing it again, really... I don't know what else I'd call myself. I can't. Hear my old one anymore.

[(Y'do still freak out a little at this one, champ. Just the once. Yeah, well, it's still somethin' to think about.)]

[theimpatientone]

[She shakes her head, still smiling.]

I know. No one is asking you to change anything.

[worthallthis]

How does that work, then? Do you. Keep the self-name part even after you've outgrown it? Or does it come off to be replaced by something new?

[theimpatientone]

Most Sharers keep the same selfname throughout their life. Most selfnames are the sort of thing that you can never truly outgrow, and you carry them with you your entire life. They are things intrinsic to who you are.

[Merwen shrugs a little.]

[worthallthis]

[Well, they suppose that makes sense. They nod a little.]

Okay. We're on borrowed time, anyway. Might not have time to outlive a name.