networkinthenight | voice; @hicks

Entry tags:

voice; @hicks

( when he speaks his voice is soft an' easy, mild-mannered as all get-out, with an alabama accent that kicks like a mule to the head besides. he has the air of someone well-used to wieldin' some manner of authority, albeit in another fashion in a faraway place from this. )

For those of you I ain't met, name's Eugene Hicks, an' I'm one of the medics here in Beacon. If'n anybody finds themselves in want of food or company, Sundays me an' a few others are layin' out a spread at the Church. Anybody's welcome, all I ask is no fightin' under the Lord's roof. If'n you felt like bringin' a dish of your own to share, it'd be appreciated. ( he pauses, an' in a lighter tone obviously aimed to jest, ) First person to complain about my Ma's fried tomatoes or the lack of ice cream with the pie will be shown the door, no exceptions.

( it ain't a video post, but he ducks his head all the same. there's a slight jangle of his dog-tags. )

And, ah. Given that the El-Tee ( 'LT', short for lieutenant ) found a village across the river, Rastus seemed to think I ought to maybe work at buildin' a bridge so's we can all access whatever resources might be on the other side without any measure of difficulty. I can do carpentry all right, but if anyone can lend a hand it'd be appreciated. Apparently there's a creature in the river fixin' to drag folks under, so please mind yourselves if'n you're of a mind to get close.

That's all. Look after yourselves an' have a pleasant evenin'.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[She nods at that, squeezing his hand gently.]

It must be hard for you. You must get to say goodbye to most people.

Mostly, yeah. An' I know I'm lucky in that regard, because it's Hell an' gone more than most people get.

( it hurts, too, thinkin' about reggie comin' back from scoutin' the salm an' findin' him dead. lord. he hopes that his pa at least hears it from reggie an' not one of those goddamn letters.

soft, )

Grief's a funny thing, ain't it.

[Kyna nods at that, ducking her head when she feels tears prickling the back of her eyes. God. She was supposed to get here and keep it together, but suddenly she's not sure she's going to manage it.]

I'm not really good at it. Grieving.

Reckon most folks don't want it to be a specialty of theirs.

( he wraps his arm around her, leans against her, cheek pressed to the crown of her hair. )

Now you gonna tell me what's goin' on with you?

Nothing. I don't know.

[It's not really intended as a lie so much as it is stalling, because she doesn't really know where to start.]

How come every time we start talking about your problems we end up talking about me instead?

( a huff of amusement eases its way past the too-tight confines of his chest. )

I'm a man from a bygone era, Kyna, you really think I'm all that good at talkin' at length about my problems?

( never let it be said he ain't self-aware. )

[That gets her to smile, a bit tremulous.]

Okay, fine. I'll share, grandpa.

[She knows the joke falls flat because of the strain in her voice, but she goes on talking as if it didn't.]

You know those friends I told you about before? The ones who call me K? I've been trying not to think about them, but after that stupid post, I just...

[Deep breathes, Kyna.]

I just keep thinking they would have handled it so much better, you know? Nico would have, too. I've always been the one blasts shit with magic, not the leader or the diplomat, and now I can't stop thinking about how much I need them and how I'll never see them again, and...

[It comes out all in a rush, like once she starts she can't stop, and then she cuts herself off with a choked sob. Kyna hunches down and covers her mouth, as though that will somehow hide the slip. Maybe if she stops talking, she won't start crying in earnest.]

( something in his expression cracks, an' it's all he can do to just wrap his arm around her an' try to instill some measure of calm in her by the proximity of warmth and touch. maybe this would'a been easier if he'd asked her to bring wash along, too. he rubs her back gently, the second time in as many weeks as they've wound up like this. somethin' in the goddamn water.

or, more likely, in the darkness. he knows it's wearin' on him. it's bound to be worse for someone who's whole identity is bound up in bright light an' burning fire. )

Ain't nothin' that says you won't see them again somehow, huh? We weren't accountin' for this world when we passed on, who's to say what comes after this? Or the next one after that, an' the next? We can't be sure of anythin', goin' forward. Hold to that. Souls have a way of findin' each other in the dark.

( askin' someone to have faith is a lot, especially given where they are an' how they got here, but. it's what he's got. he presses a soft kiss against the crown of her hair. )

An' don't you worry none about how things went down. You did your best, an' that's all anyone can ask for. You'd be too much to handle if you were a perfect diplomat on top'a everythin' else you've got goin' on. ( don't make him extol your virtues, kyna, he'll do it in spades. but his tone is gently humorous anyhow. ) Then folks'd be nothin' but jealous. It'd get old right quick.

[Kyna snorts, her tone wry and disbelieving.]

I'm not as good at things as you think I am. I'm good at magic, but even that's fucked up here. And I'm not good at...

[She takes in a shuddering breath, half a sob, wondering if she should even keep going, or if what she wants to say is going to make any sense.]

I'm not good without people, you know? I fuck up all the time and Tucker and Harlan always had a way of... I don't know. Of making me better.

[And Wash does too, yes, but in a different way.]

( he's always been a solitary man. as a boy he spent hours alone, an' he'd had no difficulty in leavin' his family for brooklyn. if it weren't for reggie he'd have spent those three years without speakin' to another soul anywhere that wasn't ezra's workshop. he just ain't possessin' of that manner of need. but he recognizes, too, the fact that other people ain't like that. that kyna isn't. )

We don't get to pick who we keep. All's we can hold onto is what they gave us while we had 'em.

( reggie was his first an' the only friend he ever expected to make in his life. he'd say this place was provin' him wrong if he hadn't died to get here. )

They made you better, an' you're still that better person. But now it's just somethin' you're doin' to honour a memory. An' of course you fuck up, you ain't nothin' else so much as human. It ain't about the fuckin' up that's the issue, it's what you do after that informs your character.

[She lets out a shuddering sigh, digesting that. She'd always thought that she was permanently reckless and impulsive, and that the only thing keeping her in check was the people around her, but maybe he's right. Maybe that's a better way of looking at it.]

How do you stay so... Positive?

[And then, with a soft, uncertain sniffle, she adds:]

You said "fuck".

( he laughs. a bright, soft sound, for all that he's faintly hoarse in the doin'. )

Lotta practice.

( once upon a time he was faced with a choice. he had every opportunity to harden his heart against the world, an' instead he reached for the qualities his folks had tried to instill in him. he holds to 'em even in the darkest times, instinct over impulse. a memorial to his ma, a monument to his pa an' a pledge he made once to his brothers. )

An' I surely did. Don't tell anybody, it'll ruin my reputation as a good, god-fearin' Southern gentleman.

[She smiles just a little.]

I won't. Promise.

[Then she leans up to kiss him on the cheek.]

Thanks, Gene. You're really good at this.

( the press of her lips against his cheek is warm an' he ducks his head faintly as she does it. it ain't enough to make him blush, but it puts somethin' warm and settled down in the soul of him. he squeezes her hand, just a little. )

You think you're gonna be okay?

Yeah. I mean, maybe not right away, but...

[She squeezes back, a little tighter.]

You really helped. Are you gonna be okay?

( soft, )

Reckon so.

( maybe not right now. not today. hell, verdict's out on tomorrow an' the one that follows. but. one foot in front of the other, an' he'll wind up okay one day. )

You can keep on with that, by the way, if'n you want. I don't mind. The nickname.

[She pulls back to blink up at him in the low light of their lanterns, taken aback.]

Oh. Are you sure? If it's too soon or... Or too much...

( gently, )

Kyna, I ain't a man what says somethin' firm if I ain't sure on as a matter of course.

( he's immovable in that way. always has been. )

I want you to use it so long as you're all right about it.

[That gets her to smile again, soft and genuine.]

Okay. You can call me K, too. It was nice.

( he leans against her a moment longer, an' then begins the process of gettin' to his feet. he offers his hand as he does. )

All right. Let's get on back. Wash'll be chewin' his nails by now, I reckon.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

voice; @hicks

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject